It's so hard to forget pain, but it's even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for happiness. We learn so little from peace.   Chuck Palahniuk While being happy is the preferred, the ideal, the coveted it is in experiencing sorrow that we grow in character and appreciate the happier times.  It is easy to forget about happiness as it leaves behind no true reminder of its presence.  Sorrow, however, leaves behind a mark on our hearts and we have a touchstone to go back to after we have learned what we should from the time of sorrow.  It is in the happier times that the touchstone is acknowledged and used because our happier times are made sweeter by the sorrow we have experienced and learned from.  If you do not know what I mean then I would suggest that you have not experienced and learned from sorrow.  If you are tracking with me then we are kindred spirits in the touchstones sorrow has birthed in our lives.

You cannot protect yourself from sadness without protecting yourself from happiness.   Jonathan Safran Foer We walk a balance beam when we do things to protect ourselves.  If we build walls to protect ourselves from painful things and people then we have also erected walls against happy things and people.  Oh we might have the  intention of the walls being removable or partial but the reality is they aren't.  A wall is a wall and when we feel the need to protect ourselves we build it at the cost of living a full life.  Life is fullest when there is a balance of happiness and sadness.  If we want the full life we must walk the balance beam between the two and not give in to the temptation to protect ourselves to the point of living a lackluster life.  When we learn to embrace the sadness that leads to fuller happiness we navigate the balance beam with perfection.  

Every man has his secret sorrows which the world knows not; and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad.    Henry Wadsworth Longfellow Sadness , I think, causes us to build walls around our hearts and lives.  Something about  sadness  creates in us a fear of letting others in or close so we make ourselves an obstacle.  Sometimes we are aware of the sadness in others, sometimes we are not.  But to sorrow alone is one of the worst things I can think of to do.  It is in sorrow that we need the comforting touch of another, the gentle voice of someone who loves us, and the clarity with which someone else can provide.  What would happen if we chose not to build walls with our sadness but instead built gates and openings and let others in.  Might our sorrow cease and we bloom with warmth?