Indifference and neglect often do much more damage than outright dislike.   J.K. Rowling At least with dislike we are feeling something.  When we are indifferent and neglectful that usually means we have fallen into numbness, i.e. we no longer care.  And complacency does much more damage than feeling something.  Complacency leads to lying, neglect (which causes a lot of damage - just look at the homes of hoarders where they have neglected the upkeep), isolation, unwillingness to engage in life, delusion, etc.  Those are all damaging.  But when we are honest about what we are feeling (i.e. "I dislike that person") we are at least allowing feelings to have their voice.  That's the other thing indifference and neglect do, they shut up the voices of feelings.  And shutting up our feelings always leads to great damage.  So dislike if you must but don't become indifferent and neglectful because the damage will be so much greater.  

Is fat really the worst thing a human being can be? Is fat worse than vindictive, jealous, shallow, vain, boring, evil, or cruel?  Not to me.   J.K. Rowling Rowling asks the best question.  I've actually been thinking about this lately.  We look at someone and immediately assign value to them based on their appearance.  And the sad reality is that we look at overweight people, specifically, and we pass judgment on them.  We, out loud or quietly, degrade them by assuming they are lazy, undisciplined, lacking self-control, etc.  If watching Biggest Loser has taught me anything it has taught me that overweight people are overweight for a reason and it isn't laziness, lack of discipline (at the core of the issue), etc.  And it has proved that overweight people are kind and generous and most importantly have value and worth.  I'd rather be friends with someone overweight but amazing than friends with someone who fits the mold of our culture but ...

If you want to know what a man's like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals.   J.K. Rowling Oh gosh is this the truth or what?!  Rowling provides a character litmus test in today's quote.  It is not an accurate way to view someone by how they treat people they think are equal to them on whatever level they are using as that equalizer.  The accuracy of someones character is in how they treat people that don't reach that level of equalizing.  And we all have some level we have created. People that we meet we place into  categories : they meet us on the same level (i.e. we are equal), they don't reach the level or they are above the level.   If we really want to know about OUR true character as well as the character of others then we should step back and observe.   In the case of others don't let them know they are being watched  because  then you might get a show.  Just watch and see what happens.  ...

Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.   Albus Dumbledore (aka J.K. Rowling!) Ever been amazed at someone who able to be happy in the midst of really dark times?  It's because they flipped the light on.  It's because  they are privy to a secret that we need to know as well.  The secret?  Happiness is found in all places of life.  Even in hard, dark moments.  Maybe most especially in hard, dark moments.  Happiness without depth is fleeting but happiness that is deep is coveted.  It's the difference between two terminally ill patients - one who is at peace and smiling and generous with everyone around them and the other who is angry and mean to everyone around them.  The first flipped the switch to on, the second couldn't find the switch. Happiness is there.  It's yours for the taking. Just flip the switch to on.