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Want to end the fight?

He who forgives ends the quarrel.  African Proverb

Forgiveness is tough.  I'm the first one to say it.  It isn't easy and it takes some work.  But when we can actually forgive the other person then suddenly we find all the arguing ceases.  There's no more quarrels with the person, there's no more quarrels within yourself about the situation (am I the only one who has arguments with myself in the shower?  And why the shower?  What is it about the water that draws it out of me?  Cleansing perhaps?  Hmmmm.), and there are no more quarrels with others about the quarrel with the other.  (You followed that right?)  Forgiveness leads to the end of the arguing.  It leads to closure which is what we need most.  It can also lead to healing and reconciliation which we also need the most.
A few years ago I was betrayed by several people that I trusted.  It was a painful time and it led me into a season of having to learn how to forgive.  It was a, no joke, FOUR YEAR process.  (Aren't you just exhausted thinking about that?!  I am.)  During the four years, as I went down the list of being able to forgive people I found that two things happened.  One, I quit having those arguments in the shower about the situation and two, I quit replaying it (which I think can be a form of arguing) over and over and eventually I forgot the specifics.  Oh I remember the overall betrayal, what happened to me you don't forget easily or ever but I forgot the specifics and if you asked me today what they were I would be hard pressed to relay the story exactly.  Why?  Because I forgave and it ended all the quarreling.
What about you?  Does something about today's quote resonate?  I encourage you to do the work of forgiveness and if you need an ear or some advice give me a shout out.  I'm happy to help.

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